Conception and Sexual Lubricants

Dr. Myrtle, My partner and I are trying to become pregnant, but we struggle with vaginal dryness. Is one lubricant better than another, or should we use anything at all? Do you know anything about a product called Pre~seed? Help! Infertility (the inability to become pregnant) is due to sperm-related (male) problems about 33% of the time. Yet more than half of couples trying to conceive also deal with the usual problems of skin & vaginal dryness, and logically turn to sexual lubricants or saliva to solve that problem. Yet scientific research is pretty clear in showing that many sexual lubricants impair not only the movement, but also the survival of sperm. The most important features of sperm fertility success are staying alive and the ability to move around. For this they’ll need: a basic pH environment (or in gardening lingo, lime [basic] not sweet [acidic]), a moderate amount of food (glucose is preferred over fruit sugars), the perfect amount of salts (aka osmolality), a liquid-y swimming fluid, aka semen (too dry makes it too sticky, and too concentrated makes the semen toxic), no alcohol (dissolves their membranes), and should we say, a little bit of lovin’? Commonly available sexual lubricants such as KY, Astroglide, & Replens have all been shown to stop sperm in their tracks, and kill sperm after an hour's time in the pool. Even that natural stand-by, saliva, decreases sperm movement and progression. So what’s a couple to do? Reflect back on what we know about vaginal lubrication. Vaginal lubrication is increased when a woman is highly aroused, because arousal is the process of bringing blood and fluid to the genitals. Watching erotic movies together, masturbating to orgasm before penetration, and gee… having fun with intimacy can go quite a way toward improving the vaginal moisture of many women. I know trying to get pregnant can seem like a chore, especially after you’ve been trying for a while, but maybe you need to look as sexual arousal as a goal, rather than seeing penetration-just-to-get-pregnant as your goal. Prolonged sexual arousal improves the fertility characteristics of men’s sperm as well! Semen (sperm + carrying fluid from the epididymis, prostate & seminal vesicles) is enhanced with 3-day periods of abstinence (no ejaculation), followed by a prolonged sexual arousal and multiple ejaculations. (In terms of animal husbandry, the second and third (!) ejaculate is far more "fertile" than the first.) So as your partner is nearing her egg-releasing time (ovulation), hold off on ejaculation for 3 days, then plan a day-long tantric sex extravaganza! (Yes, you might have to take a day off work, but this seems like nice homework…) Men! Eat your fruits, vegetables and nuts! It is no coincidence that avocados and strawberries are considered aphrodisiacs: they contain some fine antioxidants which help preserve the sperm and semen from toxic substances. Sperm are very sensitive to something called “oxidative stress”, and anti-oxidants in the diet have a relationship to the amount of protection they can provide in semen. Chocolate is your friend. I’m sorry to say that you might not want to be exercising heavily during your three days of abstinence, although cold showers are okay. Some animal studies suggest that seminal oxidative stress increases in proportion to the amount of exercise the animal performs. So low-to-moderate exercise might be best to support your semen. But Doctor, I still have a lubrication issue! Your three best options seem to be: Pre~seed, Eros (regular, not gel), or ID Millenium. After extensive product review and testing, we agree with the manufacturers of "Pre~seed" that it is one great lubricant. The studies performed on sperm movement and ability to survive are very convincing, and the quality of the lubricant itself may have helped ready-to-conceive couples to have a pleasurable intimate episode. It’s best applied for your prolonged tantric sex sessions when the female partner is ovulating. Pre~seed also might be a nice choice for women who experience burning with different lubricants, since the acid balance is intentionally different (less acidic) from most other lubricants on the market. Disadvantages of Pre~seed? Because it's intended market is for conceiving women, the product is sterilely packaged in one-time applicators, and formulated without preservatives. This makes is suboptimal for regular use (since you can't dispense just a little bit). However, for those who enjoy it's cushion-y and less-acidic formulation, it might work well to use it anyway. For other options, some of our conception-focused customers have also had good luck with the thinner silicone-based lubricants, such as Eros (regular, not gel), or ID Millennium, although I have not seen research studies specifically addressing these products. We do know that silicone-coated catheters used to collect semen for insemination from men with spinal cord injuries had a minimal effect on the motility and survival of sperm. We also know that stable medium-to-long chain oils such as canola or mineral oil have no effect on sperm viability or motility. (Olive oil, like saliva, even in low concentrations, decreases sperm movement.) However, oils are not a good choice for many women, since the vaginal space doesn't clear oils very easily. How you apply the lubricant might also be important: Most people struggle with dryness at the vaginal opening and on the vulva, as well as dryness along the penis shaft. Applying a very light layer of silicone lube on the shaft of the penis and/or on the vulva and opening of the vagina will give you lubricant where you need it most, and avoid the area near the cervix where semen will be deposited to begin their journey up through the uterus. This massage could certainly fit into the prolonged tantric sex session I suggested above. Best of luck. Dr. Myrtle