This comprehensive book is really the practical guide for anyone interested in a wide array of BDSM practices. Author Jay Wiseman is very knowledgeable and open-minded in his approach, and describes in great detail how to have a safe, sane, consensual and fun time with a number of BDSM activities -- including, but not limited to, bondage, spanking, flogging, clips and clamps, temperature play, roleplay, and more. The emphasis is decidedly on safety and consensuality, and SM 101 includes a terrific checklist for players to bring to their pre-scene negotiations, so both players know their needs are being met. The one downside is it was written in 1996, so there’s lots of discussion about the benefits of spermicidal lubricants, which has since been pretty much disproven. Almost all the other information is very much still applicable, though.
If you’re looking for a ”why-to” guide, try Come Hither; if you’re looking for a practical, hands-on, ”how-to” guide, this is a wonderful resource.